Cartalk

CARTALK - comment submitted by Larko to Click and Clack, the Tappet brothers

Dear Tappet brothers

I have an occasional mishabit of tuning in to your show. I thought I had developed a cure against it during the summer vacation. But yesterday morning, through a random access to my pre-tuned FM channels, I fell in again. I wasted a perfectly good our of my time listening to Cartalk!

The listening experience activated a mental note that I made something like one year ago while also ruining my breakfast by monitoring a conversation between the two of you and a mother who was considering to buy a car to her then 16 year old daughter. Your recommendation to the poor mother was not to buy a fast car because the daughter would probably not be able to resist the temptation of trying out the maximum speed of that car. My mental note back then was to provide you with following comments:

1. What kind of a country could be irresponsible enough to allow and even encourage CHILDREN at the age of 16 to administrate a motor vehicle?

2. In this part of the World the minimum age to posses a driver's license is 18 years. As I have the privilege of knowing quite a lot of persons at that age, I can say that even this age limit is far too low.

3. The proper legal procedure to obtain a driver's license could be as follows:

3.1. A license can be issued to a person not younger than 30 and not older than 69 years. By the age of 25, a person is allowed to participate in procedures described at 3.2 and 3.3.

3.2. All applicants must be submitted to a psychological evaluation of their suitability to drive a motor vehicle. Any person evaluated to belong to one or more of following cathegories shall not pass: would-be or actual mass murderers, persons with IQ level same as or lower than Gov. George W Bush, girl friends of President Clinton, persons with a maternal status with spouses (former, present or future) of any Tappet brother or Yours Truly. (In plain language, this is their mothers-in-law.) An applicant, who fails to pass the evaluation, is allowed a re-try after a period of five years. During that period, the applicant must listen to re-runs of Cartalk for at least 2 ours each day (Christmas day and President's day excluded).

3.3. An applicant who passes the evaluation described at 3.2. must participate in a theoretical, practical and virtual education for a period of five years. This university level education may be provided by any acknowledged college or by the senior janitors of U.S. Congress.

3.4. An applicant who fulfills the above conditions (3.1 to 3.3) and passes an exam provided and administrated by The Afghanistan Women's League or by The Florida Association of Ballot Counters will be issued a driver's license for a period of ten years. In case the license holder survives that period, the procedure described above will start all over.

4. I take a pride in announcing that at age 43, I have never possessed a driver's license. Nor have I any intention of applying for one. I might, however, accidentally happen to tune in to one of your shows. But that would be against the advice of shrink and attorney.

Wishing you all the best
Larko 
President of Baltic Beer Lovers